In a fireside chat Monday evening, Brooke Shields talked about her new book, her upcoming 60th birthday, the importance of female friendships, empty nesting and how midlife is an exciting time to start new projects.
Chatting with Samantha Skey, chief executive officer of She Media, Shields gave insights into her new book, “Brooke Shields Is Not Allowed to Get Old,” (Flatiron Books), and spoke about her role as CEO of Commence, a hair care company, as well as her daughters, her passion for comedy (particularly dark humor and physical comedy), how she hopes to celebrate her 60th birthday (multiple celebrations all year with different groups of friends), and what she’d love to do next in her life (she’d love to do more Broadway and have her own TV show again).
The conversation was hosted by Flow Space and held at Penske Media’s studio at 475 Fifth Avenue before a packed audience.
Shields said the reason for writing the book was because she had started Commence and it was a platform for women and a community group. “We were asked to solve specific problems and hair care was one of the really important pieces on women’s minds over 40. So in talking to women I started to realize that there was a real need for this. So the company grew, and all of a sudden I found myself as a CEO at age 58 at the time, and it was such an extraordinary learning curve for me. My agents would say, ‘why don’t you write a book about it?’”
Shields decided to use her story as a jumping-off point, but wanted to understand the research. For example, “When does a woman’s confidence peak? How is it different? What’s actually going on with her scalp and her body, and it’s not all horrible and bad and the end of the road. There’s a joy in realizing you’ve gotten this far and wanting to do more,” said Shields.
The book became a way to talk to women who are 40-plus and to look at marketing and how women are treated, she said. Her goal was to look at women not just in her industry — entertainment — but “just in everybody’s lives now. And I was shocked at the little representation,” she said.
Shields recalled going to a cocktail party at her daughter’s friend’s home and was talking to the owner of the house. “We were talking about wine, and I made the horrible misstep of telling him my age because I was thinking of a 1965 bottle of Barolo is like jam at this point. I thought it was a funny tidbit to add to the book, and he changed his tune so quickly and he went from being… “like you really shouldn’t have told me that . . . . And I was like, ‘you know my age and now it’s offensive?’”
So that’s how she came up with the title of her book: “Brooke Shields Is Not Allowed to Get Old.”
Certain people have had [celebrity] pictures on their locker and when they grow older, people are not ready for it. “Because that personal relationship with that person is no longer the same. And therefore we age as well. And it’s just I had the gall to actually get older,” said Shields.
Shields said she feels better about herself today than she did in her 20s. “There’s just so much more that I’m looking forward to.” She said there’s this collective feeling of “We get overlooked . . . . You’re either the hot girl at the bar or you’re in Depends,” quipped Shields.
Brooke Shields
George Chinsee
Shields said there is a certain power that comes with getting older. Once her daughters went off to college, several things happened. “You have to re-meet your partner, you have to reestablish who you are in yourself, and it’s a period of adjustment. The women who I know who are 40-plus are amazing,” said Shields. She said her friendships have gotten fewer but more necessary and less obligatory. “Female friendships are so important, and it’s OK if they don’t all know each other and love each other. I have friends that I do this with, I have friends that I laugh like that with, I have my boozy friends and I have my granola friends, and they each serve a different part of my soul and psyche,” said Shields.
Skey said that she and Shields have had conversations about what happens once your kids leave for college. “And you were like, I don’t have context for this moment. What happens here? Am I meant to have a grandchild? Should I clean the twigs up in my empty nest?” said Skey.
Shields said she hates the term, “empty nest . . . . dry little twiggy. There’s no vitality, there are no parties.” She wants to flip the narrative, and help women see themselves “the way your friends see you.”
